Oh, The Times...

They are a-changin'.

I can't go into many details right now, but our little family is about to have some big changes. Big changes that don't (I repeat don't) involve the pitter patter of little feet, or anything like that.

I'm writing this in the midst of a crazy storm, with some pretty impressive lightning. It's a reminder, for me, that, as Rich Mullins so aptly put it, we are not as strong as we think we are. In the times that I long to be in control, I have to remember Who is in control.

In Job 38:24 God asks Job if Job knows the way to the place lightning comes from. We may have a better understanding in our day and age of how lightning actually works, but we certainly don't control it.

In the times I feel so insanely blessed it leaves me without words, I have to remember Who each of these blessings is from.

Times change. What seemed out of control several months ago can be life's biggest blessing. Sometimes when the storm passes, it leaves something beautiful.

I Just Can't Get Enough

I just can't get enough....of this adorable face.

I know, I know. I'm one of those mothers who insists her child is the most amazing child ever born.

But in all honesty, most days he just amazes me. If you have kids, you probably feel that way about them, too. So you know where I'm coming from.

My Wiggle Man is a bundle of energy, sure. (Hence the nickname.) But he's also growing up into such an amazing little boy. Helpful around the house? Check. His favourite chores are putting things into the garbage for me, and putting away his toys. (Ok, well, maybe he doesn't love that one, but he's getting pretty good at it for someone who's not two yet.) Tonight? He put his dirty socks in what would have been the laundry basket. Had his basket not still been sitting in my room, filled with folded laundry waiting to be put away.

He's also quite the love bug. One thing he never seems to get enough of is kissing boo boos. He will point out his two-week old very recent boo boo on his arm, pretend to cry a little, and come get his kiss. Also, you can ask if if you have a boo boo. For me, he points out any freckle he can find (and there are many) since I guess they look like tiny scabs to him. Nice. Once he's shown me me boo boo, I can ask for him to kiss it better, which he does so sweetly.

There you have it. My Wiggle Man--Mommy's Little Man.

And now for something completely different.

An update: I mentioned in an earlier post something terrifying I've been attempting:

songwriting. I've gotten past the initial jitters, and shared some of my stuff with Hubba Hubba, and a few other people. Now, I'm trying to figure out what (if anything) God would have me do with what I've written. Suggestions?

I'm enjoying the process, so I'll likely keep it up, even if no one ever hears my songs. Songwriting gives me a way to focus my prayer, Scripture reading, and even deep-thought thinking. It's kind of like my own unique devotional time.

And that's a pretty good thing, I'm thinking.

Busy, Busy, Busy!

I'm totally blogging as a means of procrastination. And I like it!

Hubba Hubba and I need to spend today getting some of our stuff packed up. Where are we moving, you ask? Nowhere. At least, not yet. If you've been following my blog for a while, you know that we've been trying to get approval for a 2 year mission in Kenya. That is still mucked up in who-knows-what kind of political/cultural/denominational mess.

The short version of our life is that we share our house with my sister-in-law. So all of our stuff that wasn't needed in our house (kitchen appliances, dishes, furniture) is in another building that will shortly be put to better use. So we must pack.

All the work of packing without any of the excitement of a new place. Ah, well.

If you're new to my blog, and want to be praying for us--we'll take all the prayers we can get! We'd love to know where God is directing our family. If the mission field is not His plan for us right now, there is also the possibility of pastoral ministry in the U.S.

I suppose I should quit procrastinating, and get to filling boxes.

For real. Here I go.

Know What I Mean?

Do you ever have one of those days (or weeks, or months...years...) where nothing is going right? It seems you're being attacked from every angle. It's been one of those weeks for me. It seems that everywhere I go, someone's got something unpleasant to say to/about me. Or something I've done. Or not done.

I sat down this afternoon with some Oswald. (Chambers, that is. My Utmost For His Highest--one of my favourite devotionals. The one I come back to when I need a good kick in the seat. Like today.)

Today's devotional directed me to 2 Corinthians 12. I didn't make it through the chapter, because verse 10 stopped me in my tracks. It's the one where Paul talks about being strong in his weaknesses. My first thought was that even my weaknesses are weak. They're not the weaknesses a truly godly woman should have. Like, you know, being persecuted for Jesus or something.

Really?

My weaknesses aren't good enough? It was almost enough to make me laugh out loud.

What if, what if I could learn to lean on Jesus even in my weak weaknesses? The un-pretty ones? What if I could hand my struggles (the ones that would never make a great novel for made-for-t.v.-movie) to Him and trust that He'll be my strength?

What if?

Rock Stars and Worshippers

Last night was my first official night "on the job." You may remember I've started a new part-time job at a local church as their contemporary worship leader. I'll admit I felt a little apprehensive going into that first rehearsal. Even though I knew many on the team from the year Hubba Hubba spent interning at that church, there was still that unknown factor. How would we fit together as a team? How would they handle new leadership? My leadership?

I'm a firm believer that baked goods can pave the way for good relationships. A little old fashioned maybe, it's somewhat along the lines of bringing a pie to the new neighbours. So, I baked my favourite brownie recipe. (Any excuse to bake brownies, really...I love brownie batter. Or cookie batter, for that matter. Cake batter's good, too. You get the point.)

Armed with fresh out of the oven brownies and a plan to spend the beginning of rehearsal chatting about what worship means, off I went.

Being a worship leader is an odd thing, sometimes. You're the one up front, singing the songs, and your mic is the loudest. Naturally, people look at you the most. For some people, that may be part of the appeal, I don't know.

I tend to think there's a difference between being a rock star, and being a worship leader. (Besides the metallic shirts, tight jeans and pyrotechnics, of course.) The difference isn't training, or skill levels. Sound checks are just as important. Good equipment is just as important. I would even argue that talent is important.

Don't get me wrong here, friends. I think God uses, and blesses, the best we give Him. Whatever our 'best' may be. But I think He wants and deserves our best. That's the key difference between a rock star and me--my heart. The reason I do what I do needs to be love for my Lord. That love is what should motivate me to practise, to hone my skills, to choose the best equipment, and do whatever else is necessary to give Him by best. My all. Not a love for music, or performing, or anything else. Love for Jesus.

That's the gist of what I shared with my team last night. I hope they were as blessed by our time together as I was. And if they weren't--at least they got brownies.