I've been thinking through this post for a couple days now. It's been in there, ruminating, while I try and decide how to clearly say what I'm thinking.
I've decided I can't. Say it clearly, that is. Of course, I'll spew it out in convoluted fashion for you, gratis.
Here's the thing. I know I serve a God who is sovereign. I know that. And I also know that while He is infinite in all things--knowledge, power, etc, I know that I am most definitely not. In fact, I'm most definitely finite. His ways are so far above mine that it's not even funny.
I get that. Sort of.
But then the whole problem of suffering crops up, and throws me for a loop. So many people much smarter than I have tackled this problem, so believe you me, I'm not expecting to solve it. Not today, not likely in 50 years, should God grant me that much time to ponder.
Monday was an incredibly happy day in our household. We got the news that Hubba Hubba had passed his last ordination exam. Now all that is left before he becomes Rev. Hubba Hubba is some paperwork, and a little bit of being in front of Presbytery.
This is exciting, seriously. If you've followed me for a bit, you know that we've been pursuing a 2 year mission in Kenya. You also know that our plans seems to have stalled, mucked up in who-knows-what kind of political/denominational/cultural mess. With no end in sight, I might add. We've kept our life in a holding pattern, hoping that something would break in the situation, and we could head off to serve the Lord over there.
But it seems like maybe He's asking us to serve Him over here somewhere, at least for now. So you can imagine that we're pretty pumped to see that the holding pattern might break. We're ready for the next step, whatever He wants that to be. Or wherever.
That same day, I checked out MckMama's blog,. as I do often, and found out that her youngest, Stellan, who many of us have been praying for since before he was born, is in the hospital with some pretty serious heart issues. (Incidentally, check out her blog for updates, prayer opportunities, and ways to help, if you feel so led.)
The contrast between joy and concern hit me like a brick. MckMama and I serve the same loving, sovereign Lord. Yet, while I was rejoicing in answered prayer, she was on knees before Him.
It's hard to get. I know that neither situation changes the fact that God is loving, and sovereign. I guess for now it's about trusting in that very fact--He is loving, and sovereign.
See? I told you it was convoluted.